Swimming in an ocean of thoughts.....

Ask me no questions and i shall tell you no lies :)

Friday, March 6, 2015

Mindless musings 2 ~ From a Nomad's diary

The past few weeks have been unbelievably roller costar. And, I have ranted enough about it. In those days, I figured out a couple of things. Starting with which, I hate potatoes and I love cheese. And, when this ‘hate-love’ subjects come together, they create magic! I was into a heavy binge phase in the past few days and realized that my body reciprocated their love by storing them in the parts of the body, better not mentioned. Not that I suddenly became overweight or something, but yes, the lethargy that has set in is beginning to question my agility! The brighter side is, I am back to what I am, feisty and fiery! The desire that threatened my health is thankfully gone.

We celebrated Holi today and it felt good, despite the fact that I do not like the festival much. It is not the colors entirely, but the way they are splashed around. Nevertheless, we played it here and my son enjoyed a lot. After having stayed in water for long, he came out shivering. Of course, what did you expect son? And, making him to stand in the Sun till he dried was becoming insanely difficult with ladies jumping at every given opportunity to advice me on what I should be doing – “Oh! He will fall sick! Why is he shivering so much? Did you not bring him some clothes?” etc…. It is at such times, I feel exhausted trying to be tolerant to people who are plain sly, passing carefully cameflouged snide remarks about the parent that I was, uncaring and unloving. If people just minded their business, this world would be more tolerable. I believe so. And after eating two plates of cake, sitting in the warmth of the sun later, with all the shivering gone, my son was ready to climb a banyan tree! What I am saying is, people! I know my son well enough and I take good care of him. And guess what, I just cannot help feeling a sense of pride when I speak what I feel like. Because, I just did today.

That said, I hate cliques. I hate them really. I find them to be dumb, nasty and clownish. It is as if each of them is alive only when in a group and the rest of the times, they are plain dysfunctional. Whatever, cliques bring out the blues in me. Hubby keeps advising me that cliques need to be dealt with tact, something which I feel, I severely lack. Maybe, I am not as emotionally intelligent as him because, he does have a way with words (something that I have not learnt from him yet). I have never flipped on most occasions (a few perhaps I have) but now I know a thing for sure. I cannot be tactful in all situations, even though that is the logical requirement of the hour. And I know why. Sometimes, it is better to be blunt than to parade as tactful. Not many have the intellect to understand the tact. And some people just walk all over you thinking you are gullible to their comments on your lifestyle. Sometimes, the other person has to know where to stop poking their nose and when to stop giving advice. And I tell myself, “Accept girl! You are spoilt rotten!” Why? Because I met gem of people in the previous place, that I feel a bit lost here. Not because people aren't good here. They are nice, very nice. But they judge way too much and their judgments are anything but silent. Sometimes, the sting hurts. Other times, it amuses. But then, this is life and I might as well accept it as it is.

As for the rest, I am waiting to get back home to my parents for a while as hubby is going out for 3-4 months. How I have missed home food! Sigh! Parents are God’s gift. You fall back on them every time you are in distress. I understand the challenges my parents might have faced, while raising me. It is not easy being a parent, especially when your child is going to be influenced more by the outside world than by his inner circle. Very few are exceptions in this regard. I for one, had extremely opposite and strong views about anything and everything a few years back. I was like a dynamite waiting to explode at every given argument. There were even times I could not agree on anything with my mother. We have had our fair share of arguments and fights with her declaring curfew whenever friends planned some outing late evening. Those times, I was angry with her for not letting me in my element or space. When I was working, it was my dad’s turn to squirm loud enough, each time I told him that I am sleeping over at a friend’s place or am going on a long drive with friends or am going for a weekend break to a beach. Later post engagement, hubby and my dad both used to frown from their respective states if I mentioned that I would be reaching home late in the night. Well, it has taken me some whites on my head to understand the depth of their concern as today I felt ticked when my son was refusing to cooperate with me on more than one instances while playing Holi and it was those very few instances that got many tongues wagging at how I couldn't handle my son. Parenting is no easy game and every child is different. So, is every parenting style then. Well, that said I am looking forward to the many challenges that await me as a parent. Bring it on, is all I can say.

Schools these days are like business centers. Itne me itnaich milenga types! I am not a teacher by degree. But I have taught in a school for a month and the children I taught were such gems. I loved them and they loved me. They just adored me and I could sense their urge to improve as I loved encouraging them. In all this, I understood one thing. Not all kids are the same. No two kids are the same. There are the fast ones. You give them a problem and they solve it even before you complete the question. There are the smart ones. They think before answering and thereby, answer correctly.  Following which, there are the sly ones that take great pleasure in complaining about the others lest I ask about their progress. Then, there are the ones who love to ape and just ape. And finally, there are the slow ones, who for some reason show little interest in keeping up with the class. I remember having spent a great deal of time with two such kids. The first week was entirely futile as both the kids did not trust me (I was new then). The second week, they warmed up by listening to me but yet, they won’t just write anything I asked them to. The third week, I started sensing a very teeny weeny success when one of them wrote something (that was wrong) and came up to me and asked if it was right. I was elated and I explained him how to write the numbers correctly. He used to write a mirror image of many numbers and alphabet (something my son does too). The other one too gradually responded. Now, the question is why to write off such students as slow. My point is a school needs to take a more delicate stand towards students who are loners or, rather different. Instead of complaining about the students not making progress, give the children some tasks that will motivate them to keep up with the class. I remember an instance when I choreographed an event with the class and I was told that not all students could participate. Not letting a child participate leaves a not so good impact on a child. My entire class worked as a team and their performance was applauded the most on the day of event.

When I talk about my class, I cannot help mentioning about this silent yet cherubic barbie doll Christina, who would just not mingle with anyone and would leave the class on a whim! Later, I observed the clique formation started at a very young age and she felt left out. And, she had a strange way of venting her frustration. She would take my permission to go to the washroom and will not turn back for hours. My assistant teacher remarked, “She is like that only. We have tried many times but she doesn't listen.” I tried talking to her but she eluded my questions. The drama continued for a week and then, the next week when she asked to go to the washroom, I said, “Ok. Christina. You can go. But tell me will you come back? Will you promise me that you will be back?” She saw me through the eye, smiled slightly, nodded very inconspicuously and started going, not before I added, "If you don’t come back as you said, you will make me sad because you promised me. You won't break my trust, will you?” Ever since that day, she never bunked classes. Next day, she got me some flowers, did her class work well and ate well too. She wasn't slow. She was just moody. Sometimes, children need attention and they need individual attention. Maybe, teachers need to stop branding students and rather, work that extra ten percent in understanding the child. You may not get extra bucks for it. But trust me, the efforts are worth it!

My son loves water so much that even after having suffered bouts of shivering after having frolicked in the pond, refused to leave the bathroom until all the lukewarm water was used up to remove the colors from his face. Result is that he is the only person among us who is as clean from all colors and hubby and I are still 'red' faced! After a good lunch, they dozed off. Well, these are the afternoons I crave for, when hubby and son nap and I write. I do not get much time to write regularly and had there been a TV, I may have forgotten my writing space altogether. That explains why I am writing so much these days, or rather ranting about the place and its people to my close friends and family. (smiles wickedly!) Jokes apart, writing is therapeutic. It makes me feel a lot better and a lot lighter (not physically of course. Wish if exercising fingers could aid in weight loss). Now, I want to read a lot of books. Because, books understand you the way no one does. At least, I would like to believe so. There is a lot on my list. Let’s see how things fructify, from no on. Till then, God help me become a little more thick-skinned, a little more humorous and a little more patient with time and surroundings! Sigh!        

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