Chapter 4: You don’t really want to hear the truth, do you? Truth can be insanely bitter.....~ Chapters from my life

8^th March 2013 -  10^th March:

Sometimes, what can cause an acute pain can be painless. And that painless feeling is scary, scarier than the normal infections and fever. Because the discomfort, the pain, the ptehelplessness can be felt by none but the patient. After visiting the second ENT in Mhow, who too felt my problem was purely psychological, my inner self forewarned me of something creepy. I for one, knew that something was terribly wrong with me. My husband too, who knew the intensity of my speech and vision, fortunately, not for a second doubted me. After a thorough search for ENT specialists in Indore City,  we zeroed upon a Dr. Piyush Gandhi who was gracious enough to call us at his home on a Sunday, which was 10^th March. By then, I had developed diplopia (double vision), droopy eyelids, difficulty in swallowing and drinking besides inability to speak. We visited him at his home and were more disappointed when he too gave me a clean chit for my throat. But, he corrected us saying that the problem was not on the ENT side but could be neurological.

Those words changed the course of events of my perfectly normal life until then. The good Samaritan doctor redirected us to a Dr. Amit Vyas, a leading neurologist in Indore. With an appointment in hand for the next day, I waited in silent tears for the night to pass. Also my parents were to arrive the next day and were to meet us directly at the hospital. The night was silent and I wanted it to continue as I was feeling sleepy. From the next day, the gory episodes of my life were to start. I couldn’t gargle at all. I couldn’t swallow anything, even water. My speech was totally gone. My vision had deteriorated. And my walk became unsteady. But the worst was yet to come. When my husband came back home after having taken leave, he was alarmed seeing my eyes. My eyeballs were not moving. My ordeal with the unknown had started. And with time, it was going to get worse.....

Lines on that day: Fear of unknown is cold and terrifying.....